I recently moved down to Eugene a little more than a week and a half ago. Main reason for the move was the upcoming term at University of Oregon, however I also moved early to gain an edge on the employment market here in Eugene. During my first few days in Eugene I applied at several places of Employment one of them being an Information Services job that really struck me as a challenge.
I applied for the job and got it. Pretty excited about where it will go.
Ive also been biking alot of late something that keeps me fairly entertained...
Then life changed... Why? why did it changed because I decided it would change. Because for some reason I couldn't continue my existence as the person I was becoming. I wasn't becoming anything horrible, I was a college student with a good job. Taking some courses I was interested in and some that I just needed. I had a group of friends that did some pretty amazing things. By no means was my life boring nor was it horribly destructive. We would throw massive parties at our house almost as if we were trying to prove something to each other and to ourselves. I mean I had fun but it definitely felt like there was more to it. Curtis and me quickly became the beer barons of the UO. It was somewhat thrilling and adventurous for a time. There is nothing like picking up and moving 2500 servings of beer and then watching it disappear in the course of a night. Beyond just the partying, drinking and girls there was my Tokyo cyberpunk class that provided me with philosophical enticement. Everything from transcendence (human evolution) to what makes us human or sentient beings. All of these experiances I shared with my room mates which provided a sense of comradery whether or not mutual I will never know. but i sure think so.
Something however didn't sit right with me somehow this lifestyle that was extremely enjoyable I didnt see lasting. I am not sure why but I subconsciously was wanting to make sure it couldn't continue to exist. So I began to set out on my path of self destruction. From trying to drink myself into failure to just plain not going to class. I am not entirely sure why I would do it but it continued to fail cause my conscious always made sure that I was maintaining high enough grades to pass. However in the end my way out of this whole mess was to join the Marine Corps which may not make sense to most. I understand that but perhaps I just felt like I needed something to create structure for a while untill I figure somethings out. I am not sure what to expect from my time in the Military but I do know that 5 years is a short time and that my life is longer and shorter than I can comprehend. My carnal nature seems to have alot of anxieties about the whole ordeal but my mind sees things in alot longer terms. My main thing that I am going to struggle with is operating on the Militaries schedule. I throughout most of my life I have always lived by my own schedule and bent both work and school around what I needed or wanted to do. Not that I am lazy just that I prioritize things differently than most.
Well I have been rambeling a bit but that is exactly what this blog is for. It is a way for me to collect and distribute thoughts. that I might not otherwise communicate... not that the i dont want to communicate the content directly more so becuase I dont care to filter, edit, crop, restructure, format, and compile it in a traditional norm. aka sentences (complete thoughts)? which I for some reason must not have... because if I write off the top of my head using my thoughts they always seem to come out in fragments... maybe there is somebody else who has the other halves of my thoughts or maybe I am just a half thought kind of person. That or i create runons that are never correctly puncuated or conjucted and annoy the hell out of my proffessors and teachers.
Reading List,
An Economic Policy for today and tommorrow - Ludwig Von Mises
The Revolution - Ron Paul
